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What My 7 Years in Therapy Taught Me: Advice for Therapists

I’ve gained a wealth of insights that could be incredibly valuable for therapists looking to enhance their practice.

After spending seven years in therapy, I’ve come to deeply appreciate the transformative power of the therapeutic process.

Therapy has helped me navigate challenges, understand myself better, and build healthier coping mechanisms.

However, along the way, I’ve also noticed certain dynamics that can either strengthen or weaken the therapist-client relationship.

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This article is not about telling therapists how to do their job, but rather, sharing what has made a meaningful difference for me as a client.

My hope is that these insights provide a fresh perspective on how therapists can enhance their approach to build trust, foster collaboration, and create a more effective healing space.

1. Building Trust Takes Time

Therapy is a vulnerable experience, and trust doesn’t happen instantly. As a client, it took me a while (Like 3 years 😅) to feel safe enough to share my fears and emotions openly.

The best therapists I’ve worked with understood that trust had to be earned through consistency, patience, and non-judgment.

 Therapist Tip: Don’t rush the process of trust-building. Small, consistent gestures—like remembering key details from past sessions, validating a client’s feelings, or simply offering a safe, judgment-free space—can go a long way in helping clients feel secure.

2. Active Listening is More Powerful Than Quick Solutions

One of the most impactful moments in therapy is feeling truly heard. I’ve had sessions where I barely needed a response, just having my therapist listen without interruption was enough.

On the other hand, being offered immediate solutions or interpretations too soon sometimes made me feel unheard, as if my emotions needed to be “fixed” rather than understood.

Therapist Tip: Listen first. Before offering advice or tools, give space for clients to express themselves fully. Paraphrasing or reflecting back what they say can be incredibly validating. Sometimes, the act of being heard is more healing than any intervention.

3. The Best Therapy is Collaborative

Therapy has worked best for me when I felt like an active participant rather than a passive recipient.

When therapists involved me in decision-making, whether it was setting goals, choosing between approaches, or reflecting on what was working, it empowered me to take charge of my healing.

Therapist Tip: Frame therapy as a partnership. Invite clients to co-create their treatment plans, set their own goals, and provide feedback. A client who feels involved is more likely to stay engaged in the process.

4. Adaptability Makes a Difference

Not every technique works for every client. In my journey, I’ve had therapists who rigidly stuck to one approach, even when it didn’t resonate with me.

The most effective therapists were those who were open to adjusting their methods based on my feedback and unique needs.

Therapist Tip: Be flexible in your approach. If a particular method or exercise isn’t working for a client, be willing to try something different. Therapy is not one-size-fits-all, and adaptability shows that you’re attuned to your client’s needs.

5. Small Wins Deserve Recognition

Therapy isn’t always about big breakthroughs. Some of the most important progress I made was in small, everyday victories, managing anxiety in a difficult situation, setting a boundary, or simply showing up for a session during a tough week.

Recognizing these moments made a huge difference in my motivation to keep going.

Therapist Tip: Acknowledge your clients’ progress—even the small steps. Saying things like, “I see how much effort you put into this,” or “You handled that situation differently than you would have before” can help reinforce growth and encourage clients to keep going.

6. Authenticity Strengthens the Connection

I’ve worked with therapists who were incredibly polished and professional, but the ones I connected with most were those who felt real and human.

Small things like a therapist showing humor, admitting when they didn’t have all the answers, or simply being genuine, helped me feel more comfortable opening up.

Therapist Tip: Don’t be afraid to bring authenticity into the room. You don’t have to reveal personal details, but being yourself rather than a “perfect professional” can help build a stronger and more relatable connection with your clients.

7. Therapy is a Long-Term Journey

Progress in therapy is rarely linear. There have been weeks when I felt great and weeks when I felt stuck. Some setbacks made me question whether I was making any progress at all.

The best therapists helped me understand that healing takes time and that setbacks aren’t failures, they’re part of the journey.

Therapist Tip: Help clients set realistic expectations for therapy. Normalize setbacks, encourage patience, and remind clients that change happens gradually. Sometimes, just hearing, “This is normal, you’re still making progress,” can be a huge relief.

Bonus Tip: Protecting Your Passion, avoiding Burnout and Valuing Your Worth in a Changing Industry

Many therapists enter the field because they genuinely want to help people, but the reality of working in modern mental health care, especially under private equity-backed companies, can make that mission feel harder than ever.

Burnout is on the rise as therapists face increased caseloads, corporate-driven productivity demands, and diminishing autonomy over their practice.

At the same time, many therapists struggle with guilt around charging for their services, particularly in a system where access to care is already limited.

But here’s the truth: You cannot pour from an empty cup.

How to Protect Your Passion and Your Profession

Set Boundaries with Employers & Clients – If you're working within a private equity-backed practice, be clear about what you can realistically manage. Push back on excessive caseloads that compromise care quality, and advocate for policies that support ethical patient care and therapist well-being.
Know Your Worth – Your education, training, and expertise have value. Whether you work for an organization or run your own practice, charging for your services is not unethical—it’s necessary. If you undervalue your time and skills, you risk burnout and financial instability.
Diversify Income Streams – Many therapists find stability by building multiple income sources—offering workshops, creating online courses, writing, consulting, or engaging in public speaking. This not only provides financial security but also helps you maintain autonomy over your career.
Find a Community – Private practice or corporate settings can feel isolating, but you are not alone in facing these challenges. Seek out peer support groups, therapist collectives, or professional organizations that can provide guidance, networking, and advocacy opportunities.
Prioritize Self-Care & Clinical Integrity – If you are being asked to prioritize profit over people, take a step back and reassess. Your well-being and your values matter. Protecting your mental health ensures you can continue providing quality care for the long term.

Therapists are essential to the well-being of individuals and communities.

You deserve to be compensated fairly, respected for your expertise, and supported in a way that allows you to continue doing what you love, without sacrificing your mental health or financial stability.

If private equity-backed systems are failing you, explore alternative models, independent practice, group therapy models, or partnerships with organizations that align with your values.

Your career should be sustainable, not just survivable.

Ebrima “Abraham” Sisay

Therapy has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life.

The insights I’ve gained along the way have not only helped me grow as a person, but they’ve also deepened my appreciation for the work that therapists do.

To all the therapists out there: Thank you for the work you do. Your patience, kindness, and dedication don’t go unnoticed.

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  1. As a therapist, I found your perspective incredibly enlightening. The point you made about tissues really hit home—what we intend as comfort can sometimes feel like an interruption in the client’s emotional process.

    I’ll definitely be more mindful of allowing the session to flow naturally and let the client decide when they need a moment. Thank you for sharing such valuable insights from your journey!

    1. Thank you for your kind words! I’m so glad that this resonated with you. It’s the small things that can make a big difference in therapy, and I’m thrilled to hear you’re considering this perspective in your practice. Keep up the amazing work!

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